Filed under Flash Fiction

HOMELESS NEWS: LOVE YOUR ENEMIES

HOMELESS NEWS: LOVE YOUR ENEMIES

Homeless News reports the Reverend Jesse Lee Peterson, President and Founder of The Brotherhood Organization of a New Destiny says, “Since feminists have gone unchallenged for decades, many have become fascists in pantsuits who tolerate zero dissent.” and waxes eloquent that “The feminists’ fake outrage over what men say is absurd. How about the rights and … Continue reading

HOMELESS NEWS: THE LEVANT

HOMELESS NEWS: THE LEVANT

Homeless News is back and UP to the minute and ahead of the curve here. HN reports that now that the war in Iraq is back on, prepare to be inundated with pundits and politico talking-heads once again mispronouncing the name of the country. It’s not Eye-rack, it’s E-rock. Know the language. Eyerack is from the old times. George Bush times, … Continue reading

THE WINDFALL

THE WINDFALL

It hadda be kismet.  How else to explain it? As I looked out the window and saw my father hobbling down the walkway toward my front door, I could only shake my head. Boy he’s got some nerve. And after all these years. When the doorbell rang, I gave sufficient time before answering it. Why not? When … Continue reading

HEART LINE

HEART LINE

“I told you it was bad.” “Yeh but it’s okay. I don’t mind being here, staying with you.” Laura picked up the pitcher of iced tea from the nightstand and freshened his glass. “I can get more ice and lemon wedges if you want, you need to stay hydrated, that’s what the doctor said.” She handed … Continue reading

PURE SHIKSA

PURE SHIKSA

A young girl in fishnet stockings walked by, as in too young for us. Not particularly exotic looking- maybe Italian, could be Jewish. Sometimes you can’t tell. I raised my eyebrows and looked at old Jack, then indicated the girl. “No, I like a shiksa,” he said. “Well, she may be a shiksa.” “No, I mean a pure shiksa.” “Oh, … Continue reading

WATERLINE

WATERLINE

They were told this was where Great Grandpa learned to fish. Over the years, the twins heard much about him. They were so young when he passed. Just three. Great Grandma said Great Grandpa came down every morning as soon as the sun started to leak over the mountain. Day after day, year after year, he came down without fail. Great Grandma said … Continue reading

DIFFERENT FOR EVERYONE

DIFFERENT FOR EVERYONE

Marty hadn’t seen his father since the big blow up. That was almost three years ago. Blow up doesn’t even do justice to how embarrassing and pathetic a scene it really was. But wasn’t that how it always went? With the fighting and yelling and hurt feelings? The modus operandi really. And for as long as … Continue reading

BAY LEAVES

BAY LEAVES

“Well doc, I think I might take down the bay leaves, that’s a start. I know it’s not a New Year’s resolution per se, but a whole ‘nother year of looking at them isn’t gonna do me a hill of beans of good. I just can’t look at them up there anymore, ya know?” “I … Continue reading

THE DEL MUNDO

THE DEL MUNDO

It was a cold dark night, yes that. Flamenco Street, 1 am. The cafes were closing up and the only sound was Jaime’s boots hitting the cobblestone street. It hadda be winter, of course. The wind blew dry as a bone. Jaime pulled his coat to his neck and swiftly made way down Flamenco, trying … Continue reading

THE NIGHT GOT OLD

THE NIGHT GOT OLD

They’d been together for a while and though Betsy felt they got along well enough, she couldn’t put her finger on why she still felt so empty. Was it the carefree way they drove down the road and he sang those lame top forty songs at the top of his lungs? Or maybe how when … Continue reading

THINGS BEHIND YOU

THINGS BEHIND YOU

(I’ve caused so much damage in the past. It’s come back to haunt me, no TERRORIZE me. Along with unforeseen events. Some things you can’t foresee, right? I know God is punishing me and not letting me move forward, for his own reasons I’m sure. And it’s pressing down and crushing me- I can’t get ahead.) … Continue reading

SAND

SAND

I’ve looked at you and agonized for days. I really just need to get away from here. You’re so beautiful, yet infinitely frustrating. And you SUCK all the life from me. I’m deflated. Do I have to do everything for you? I mean I’ve spent every waking second and minute and hour of my day … Continue reading

GYPSY HILL

GYPSY HILL

Published in the January Piker Press I spend most of my mornings sitting on a park bench. A particular one in Gypsy Hill Park. Now that I’ve quit the rat race and been off the treadmill for awhile, it’s become a regular part of my morning routine. My very early morning routine. There’s a promenade around … Continue reading

COOP

COOP

No one cared much anymore. The usual suspects who would have caused a ruckus in the past were quiet- evidence of how times had changed. All the former chatter about a “homosexual agenda” now seemed passé, out of date. There was a time when having a man who was single or divorced at the helm of the … Continue reading

LUNCHBOX

LUNCHBOX

I put a surprise cookie in your lunchbox today.   I tucked it underneath the black peppered turkey sandwich I made for you. The one on the 13-grain whole wheat bread you love so much, with the cajun mayonnaise you think is so special. It gives me such pleasure to make your lunch for you everyday. This is something I wouldn’t trade … Continue reading

NANTUCKET

NANTUCKET

Dear Bitsy, Your behavior last night was abhorrent. You hit a few too many Cosmopolitans there eh girl? How many times have I told you you can’t hold your liquor like you used to? Those days are gone Bitsy. Your rambling diatribes about the “state of things” nowadays were not only misinformed and naïve, but … Continue reading

CURSED

CURSED

Hector felt like he was getting bedsores. But just turning over was a huge chore, exhausting. And he was in the hospital anyway, isn’t that what you’re supposed to do there? Stay in your bed trying to sleep it off,  while a worker comes in periodically and takes your blood, another comes in and checks … Continue reading

THINGS TO ASK GOD

THINGS TO ASK GOD

I am unwell. And crazy too. Well crazy in the best sense mostly, but to say insane would be a stretch.  Well there’s not an appropriate word to describe it really. I should make up my own. Who says I can’t? The situation is I’m too sane. I’ve a discernment that’s more than it should … Continue reading

THERE IS NO CURE

THERE IS NO CURE

Jacob sat in the doctor’s office waiting. He was filled with worry and fed up. His symptoms had only worsened and been keeping him up at night too. When he called on Tuesday for an appointment and they told him the earliest the doctor could see him was Friday, he knew he was in for a … Continue reading

YOU KNOW IT

YOU KNOW IT

We made way into the living room fashionably late, where hors d’oeuvres were laid out on the coffee and end tables, and soft music played courtesy of a harpist- a very atmospherically appealing room no doubt. It was already a bit crowded but we found a spot on the sofa by the fireplace. The crowd … Continue reading

THAT’S HOW MUCH

THAT’S HOW MUCH

She walked over with my gin & tonic. She was in way too skimpy an outfit. I put five dollars on the table and looked at her with what I hoped was an appealing expression. “You keep the change, I know you work hard. ” She put down a cocktail napkin and my drink and … Continue reading

I REMEMBER YOUR SMILE

I REMEMBER YOUR SMILE

And it’s beautiful. I remember a time when I would see it quite often, and now that I think about it, I certainly took it for granted back then. Otherwise why would I be sitting here talking about it alone and without you? It’s been so long since I’ve seen it, and when I think … Continue reading

GOOD FATHER

GOOD FATHER

I had a dream about my dad last night. Well it was a fuzzy dream, you know. He was in it or as it is in that REM type of dreaming, the thought and vague impression of him was there. The presence of him. Well anyway it was interspersed with other dreamy things, those visions … Continue reading

MEET JOHN TAYLOR

MEET JOHN TAYLOR

I enjoy silly string more than the average person. I laughed when Anderson Cooper got scared by the fake Bigfoot. The lady in the library’s smug for some reason. They’re mowing down trees and building roads and putting up stores and the weather’s nice and there’s lots of activity all around. I had giggles yesterday when … Continue reading

LEMMING in the Piker Press

LEMMING in the Piker Press

Published in The Piker Press You’d think he woulda learned his lesson. But no. It was 2AM and he heard his cell phone ringing and started to feel around under the covers and his pillow to find it. Who calls at 2AM? Bleary eyed, he found the phone and looked at the Caller ID. Oh, I … Continue reading

NOT NIHILISTIC

NOT NIHILISTIC

First appeared in the The Dead Mule School of Southern Literature It’s a common thing around here. Family cemeteries in people’s backyards or somewhere on their land. On land that’s been passed down from generation to generation. There are currently laws on the books protecting this sacred land from development. Would you want to build a … Continue reading

TANGO

TANGO

The garbagemen aren’t bad people. Neither are the ones who work behind the pharmacy counter. Nor the guy you said was going too slow on that downtown street where the speed limit’s twenty-five. I think he was going thirty. And watching for pedestrians. Yelling out the window did nothing by the way but it did grate … Continue reading

LIFE AS AN AESTHETE

LIFE AS AN AESTHETE

Published in the Piker Press Harry was upstairs in the bedroom with the door locked. Like usual. He’d just returned yesterday from his eighth-grade camping trip, and while the very thought of having to spend any time with his classmates in any way, shape or form made him thoroughly sick to his stomach, overall it … Continue reading

COINSTAR

COINSTAR

Around 6am I went to the grocery store to use the Coinstar as I’m known to do and it was out of order. I jokingly and with feigned indignation dropped my tupperware of coins on the counter in front of the ready cashier and told her to “start counting”. Being the little darling that she … Continue reading

MOUSSAKA

MOUSSAKA

“I’m really mad at you, don’t you feel bad about that?” The waiter took away her menu. She ordered the moussaka, here where she says it reminds her the most of the moussaka her grandma used to make when she was growing up, the most “authentic” is how she put it, closest to real “old … Continue reading

HOMELESS NEWS SPRING PLEDGE DRIVE

HOMELESS NEWS SPRING PLEDGE DRIVE

This just in: Arthur Delaney of the Huffington Post reports that the U.S. Labor Department announced that “the economy has been steadily adding jobs, pushing the unemployment rate down to 7.5 percent from 7.6 percent.” Mr. Delaney adds, “The improvement won’t mean much to people without jobs, especially people who’ve been unemployed a long time.” … Continue reading

CHECKOUT LINE

CHECKOUT LINE

“You use humor as a defense mechanism,” she said. “No, actually I use it offensively.” The cashier asked for and scanned his Shrewd Shopper Discount Card. “The pizza’s two-for-one Sir.” “How so?” She was caught off-guard, eyebrows raised, hands on hips. “Well, you tell me. Who here’s on defense?”

COMPLICATIONS

COMPLICATIONS

“No I work two other part-time jobs too- one of them cleaning houses and the other picking up people’s garbage.” “Oh so like you’re a garbage woman? You ride around on the back of a truck for the county or something? In a uniform?” “No no, on my own- I have a few that I … Continue reading

HIGH RIDGE AREA FOOD BANK

HIGH RIDGE AREA FOOD BANK

Brenda has lived out in the county for over twenty years. Her ex-husband hasn’t worked in over two, leaving her with no child support for her three young children. She’s struggled to keep up with the house payments and been in danger of foreclosure for months, this despite working two jobs. She’s been coming to … Continue reading

BUZZ KILL

BUZZ KILL

Fixated. On oddities. From time to time, strange little things. I face them head on when they come up. Then they go away. Until they rear their ugly heads again.  They always do. Know what I mean? I hate my neighbor. His fat, puffy face. His awkward gait. His squeaky, incoherent way of talking. Well … Continue reading

HOMELESS NEWS

HOMELESS NEWS

Of all the wacky things we thought Facebook might roll out for its ninth birthday, Homeless News most coveted the replacement of the LIKE button with the YAY! button. Facebook’s been flat. The LIKE overused. We really need some pep. We’d rather click on YAY! The world’s too morose. Talks of more deal-making today sent the … Continue reading

GAGA FAN

GAGA FAN

A Lady Gaga fan made fun of me, trying for under her breath, when I told the cashier in the grocery store I’m a huge Muppets fan. Now I of course have been and am a fan of many things, far and wide. This cashier giggled, as I see her often do, as I frequent … Continue reading

LOOK AT ME

LOOK AT ME

I know how much you love me. Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying right here. You can spend time with me now or later. Whenever. But I can tell by the way you’re looking at me you want to right now. Yes, look at me. I don’t mind. When was the last time … Continue reading

THICK AS A BRICK

THICK AS A BRICK

My husband is so mad at me. Again. I oughta be used to it by now, but he’s really starting to grate on my last nerve. Today it was the weatherman that got him all riled up. “Being wrong again,” is how he put it. Said it over and over too. Shouting at the TV telling … Continue reading

ACME PLUMBLING

ACME PLUMBLING

Are you having plumbing problems? Acme’ll send a guy over to root and unclog your pipes. We’ll remove all obstructions and free you up good as new. When’s the last time you had them cleaned out? Feels like forever huh? I’m sure they could use it. Has your well run bone dry? Acme’ll send a … Continue reading

TUNDRA

TUNDRA

She’s cold. Frigid. And that’s not an innuendo, just an apt word to describe her. When she smiles it’s with frozen lips, which only complement her icy stare. Everything about her is chilly. Not warm in the least. Her icebound emotions and wintry disposition. Her arctic heart. It’s impossible to engage her what with her … Continue reading

PERCY

PERCY

Was I ever gonna learn not to fall into the same pattern? It never failed, over and over. I’m the guy that always overestimated people, gave them too much credit. I’m the great encourager. And every time it let me down. Why? Haven’t I acted in good faith?  It’s a “belief in fellow man” thing is … Continue reading

WAILING

WAILING

I had a dream about you last night. That’s not unusual. I’ve told you about those times when I’ve dreamt of you in the past- the odd plot lines or humorous circumstances where your face has shown up or your presence was made known.  Funny how in life it seems about anyone or anything can … Continue reading

EARWORM

EARWORM

I have terrible earworm.  You remember they talked about that on the radio last week?  That’s when something pops into your brain like a hit song from years ago that you haven’t heard in like forever and you can’t get it off your mind. The guy on the radio used the example for him of … Continue reading

THE MONKEY AND THE HARE

THE MONKEY AND THE HARE

The man walked into the convention hall, his first trade show, and was excited. The vendors were mostly educators and up and coming authors and illustrators, and although not the man’s stock-in-trade directly, he looked forward to fun and hoped to learn something along the way. Public education wasn’t all bad. The booth for the … Continue reading

GO WHERE I WENT

GO WHERE I WENT

Every once in a while I enjoy a good exercise in futility. Apparently. While others are busy making the same old tried and true resolutions, I’m sitting here taking punches and driving around in circles, all wrapped up in picking my Best of 2012. I’m looking for the top six things I’ve written- what for … Continue reading

INDIGO

INDIGO

Indigo just wasn’t gonna have it. She’d been working too hard for too long, and without any contribution from her Joebob either. LETCH! The grandkids had been having all sorts of problems and drama, and Sophie dropped them in her lap again and gone God only knows where. And on her day off too, what … Continue reading

GOTTA HAVE A TWIST

GOTTA HAVE A TWIST

Hollywood is exciting to say the least. I finally heard from that Executive Producer. He called asking for script changes and for me to do some rewrites right quick. I didn’t mind that he called, of course. They told me he’d call.  Besides, everyone seemed to really like the story so I was looking forward to … Continue reading

SCRAPPER

SCRAPPER

                          He was nervous. He had put so much heart and thought into actually meeting her, the fact that it was happening was literally off-putting. A whirlwind of emotion and glee. His knees were wobbly and his heart was a-thumpin.’ Would she even … Continue reading