SKYLIGHT

I promise this isn’t a weather report but it DID snow overnight. And that’s funny ’cause if it snowed here, there must be an awful lot of snow in environs further north. And this with Spring only three days away!

And not a moment too soon.

But it didn’t snow much and it won’t be here long and my inside plants did spend all day outside Friday when it was up near seventy. Those who needed a haircut got clipped and everyone got thoroughly bathed and soil worked while soaking up the warmth and sunshine. Happy plants! I’m glad I brought them in- it really wouldn’t be in anyone’s best interest to leave them outside to freeze to death.

I’ve done it before.

But it’s Monday and one thinks of weather among other things when planning the week ahead right? And last week was a doozy. Driving back and forth and all around to work, to church, to meetings, in the rain and wind, lugging and unloading things here and there, spending money gassing up, eating out and socializing, having places TO BE, too much talking to too many people and listening too carefully to too many, smiling as I’m apt and having that GAME face on even when it pops into my head I have stop on the way home for cat food or get meowed at relentlessly when I finally get home- and the game face is the nice thing to do- isn’t that how we do society? Or don’t you distinguish it? All I know is it’s time again to be thoughtful about the old equilibrium, what with being overcommitted some and favoring society enough as to approach off-kilter, knowing it best and right to slide back. I fully appreciate and need and crave a certain amount of sweet and restorative solitude in order to balance the time spent OUT THERE.

Oh society!

I don’t put too much stock in the concept of being BUSY as a measure of a better person or mark of a good life. Nowadays that seems the thing. How many people do you ask “how are you?” and they reply “busy” with a Mass Of Men Lead Lives Of Quiet Desperation polite resignation? And often comically as if they’re so busy they couldn’t even to begin to EXPLAIN how busy! I laugh inside. When it comes to the myriad of choices on the great smorgasbord of life I often pick “the only winning move is not to play”. Do I have to eat everything? I’ve mentioned the smorgasbord ad nauseum, but that’s what life is, isn’t it? An appealing array and selection of choices as to where we invest our time and energy? Emotional, mental, physical, spiritual blah blah? Shake head yay or nay and turn page. But we hardly feel RIGHT saying no. Gluttons! It’s ironic for me that last year at this time my choices were more limited so I was less busy and fully relished it, particularly the long periods of silence. I’d explain myself with offhand, affectionate Thoreau and Unabomber references (depending on the audience), mostly to the usual blank stares. I did wonder about my fate and the whys of it all, analysis paralysis as we do.  I guess now I have a “problem we like to have” situation and a “careful what you wish for” too. I’m pretty much doing what I set out to do but with an onslaught of cluttered society- luckily without analysis paralysis for which I thank Jesus Henry. I happen to be resolute and determined to live life as I see it with principle, as opposed to swaying with the wind. A lifestyle choice is the case, not that you asked. My being busy in March is a methodical, tactical and very step-by-step part of my very master plan.

I make my own plate.

Fascinating. YAWN. Busy, busy. OUT THERE. For the next couple of weeks, then things will change and hush up. But I gotta go to the dentist today BLEH! That’s a story unto itself. And I gotta make some calls to some people, you know. Oh, I’m writing enough new material every day to satisfy and gratify, though not at the frenetic pace I want and am capable of.

“They thrust their own low roof, with their narrow skylight, between you and the sky, when it is the unobstructed heavens you would view.” I didn’t write that—Thoreau did—but I love it.

Society.

I vant to be alone. And can’t wait! And like the frenetic writing pace. So next month I look forward to waking up to warm sunshine each morning and taking in delicious April air. And solitary walks in the woods to the river on those quiet days that never end. Corny, right? I’ll write without bother, an endless stream really, remembering it’s there I’m never alone. At night I’ll sleep with cicadas.

In solitude.

Transformation. We talk about the weather lots.  I know I do. I plan on living it up.

Yesterday a lovely and funny friend asked how everything how was going- “Hey I’m all Yoda for you and am concerned you’re not writing ’cause you’re so busy.”

I was like- “What in the hell?”

Skylight.
skylight

Advertisements

9 thoughts on “SKYLIGHT

  1. All these hospital appointments, physiotherapy, acupuncture, nutty therapy sessions!! Thats my “busy” these days. Ive been catapulted (is that the correct spelling?) into an alien world. But on very spiritual days, which come and go like the sun, I am grateful to have “opted out” even though it wasn’t my choice. 🙂

    Its just too busy for me “out there” now.
    *contented(sometimes) sigh* 🙂

    Here’s to you having a lovely April! 🙂

  2. I keep my life as uncluttered with busyness as possible. People tend to judge me for it, while at the same time seem completely envious that I’m not all flustered with a zillion things to do. I say, be true to thyself. 🙂

  3. Pete, so much of our lives has been ruined by internalizing the American work ethic. It’s like a drug, or a reason for being: I work therefore I am. Just sitting down, napping, watching the tube, or simply wandering are derided. Big issue in my life for sure.

    • Wandering is good! I prefer a quieter lifestyle generally- good for da soul. 🙂 It doesn’t at all mean one isn’t doing anything. It’s deliberate.In too much society you encounter people with their “own low roof” and that gets between you and the sky. Goes with the territory. Solitude is where the view’s unobstructed. At least that’s how it works for me.

  4. Great post, Pete. I can totally relate to craving solitude. Especially when I’m super busy, running around all the time, always listening to other people, always having to participate in conversations. Having friends and places to go and people to be with is wonderful. But alone time, is such a wonderful luxury.

    And you are so right about asking people how they are, and they answer “busy”. It’s a great observation you’ve made. Now I am going to laugh every time I hear that answer. Which is most of the time. I suppose I’ve been guilty of it myself, once or twice. I won’t any more, though 🙂

    As for learning to say “no”, that’s a hard one. But I am getting much better at it. Did it the other day, without angsting over it. Very pleased with myself. Doesn’t come naturally.

    Hope everything worked out well at the dentist’s. Not my favourite thing to do either. Although mine has TV on the ceiling which is usually a good distraction. 🙂

    • Thanks. Yeh I like it but something tells me I won’t get it. Yeh the busy thing makes me laugh as it’s like this pat answer we use in lieu of anything more specific, and we often seem to feel so busy we can’t enjoy a simple moment or connection with someone. All about balance as it always is but I’m ready for the woods! 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s