I just got back from a very nice autumnal walk through the woods down to the river, with lots of leaves crunching under foot and a chill in the air. It’s really more than a “walk” per se- it’s actually a hike as this is foothill country. Not many people in my circle are physically able to do it, and my huffing and puffing and firing endorphins at the moment are a testament to that. But I love it. Getting there is easy- walk right out my front door and I’m not too far from the trail head. Round trip (for a quick hike) takes only about forty-five minutes, and that’s with veering off the main trail and sitting and enjoying the woods and solitude and views etc. There’s no hurry. You can continue on further if you like and I have many times as this river trail is part of a local greenbelt here that connects every part of the city and its environs. I get out there as regularly as possible, although I’d (always) like to get out more.
If you stopped by and wanted to go I’d never say no.
There’s veering off the main trail as there are only deer trails into the woods, so it takes some doing to get to the actual “main” trail where the going is more obvious. This time of year it’s much more doable as the leaves have dropped and the underbrush is gone. But there is some walking off-trail and navigating bushes and felled trees and other obstacles to a certain degree. It works though and the more I do it the more I’m forging my own personal trail, which is very cool.
I’ve never seen any other people so I do call it my own.
My therapist calls this “emotional regulation”: Doing something you know you get a lot out of even when you don’t want to, and your “mood” may be foul. It’s the kind of activity that makes you happy and you know you’d like to do generally, but you fight tooth and nail with every fiber of your being to even start. Why do we do that? The emotional regulation refers to doing the activity when your mood is low in order to bolster it. And once you get your ass out there and get going, you’re glad. And once you get back you feel like a different person.
Yeh I feel much better than when I left.
Funny thing these moods we get, no? I do get a lot out of having a “good” therapist, and this guy I have is new and the jury is still out on him. But so far at least I want to go back. I don’t think there’s anything wrong at all with going to see someone, as long as you trust them to a certain degree and feel that you’re benefiting, and are willing to “work the program” as they say. And life does take some work. With all the listening I do to other people and because I don’t have anyone to listen to me, I feel just fine meeting with someone who’s paid to hear me talk about myself for fifty minutes.
I get to talk about my favorite subject.
There are many other reasons why I like and need to go. Hopefully I’ll continue and it’ll continue to be a “landing strip” of sorts for me when life becomes intolerable, which unfortunately for me it does way too much and at this juncture I’m done trying to figure out why. Currently I’m going every two weeks and went last week so will be going next. He’s a cool and interesting enough guy, although like I said the jury hasn’t even finished hearing his case yet. I wouldn’t necessarily pick him out of a line-up.
So yeh the endorphins and the pleasure of getting out there. If you know me well enough you know I’ve talked about my whole nature boy thing ad nauseam. It’s a huge part of who and what I am. And when it comes to regulating my emotions it’s almost better than good sex!
That and sushi.