It’s early Thursday morning, which is cool. What’s funny is I’ve been up for about an hour, and in that hour, floating around in the back of my mind was the thought it was Wednesday.
I got excited when I realized it was Thursday.
But why? Why do I constantly feel the need to hurry things up? That regular and ingrained weekend anticipation? All my life I’ve been trained, in our groovy modern world we all have, to look forward to the weekend and to have a good weekend and to thank God it’s Friday and hey, what are you doing this weekend?
Yeh that. But why do I feel the need to keep things moving along at such a breakneck pace? Am I somehow deliberately racing to death?
I wouldn’t have minded if it was Wednesday. I would have lived it as determinedly as any other day. But one would think human nature would want the days to go as slowly as possible, for every moment to be savored, for every breath to be wonderfully measured and appreciated and taken without regret.
Even to wish the calendar would go backward.
That being said, when the time comes and I’m staring straight into the face of death, mightn’t I get a notion that I let life sail by way too fast? I may want to kick myself in the ass!
For rushing it.
And for being so glad it was Thursday and not Wednesday, as if I wouldn’t want that extra day to live.
Time for my good old early-morning, caffeine-accompanied, it’s dark out “moral dilemma of the day”. It’s how I get my kicks! Besides I just woke up and I’ll be moving on to duller thoughts and new moral dilemmas soon enough. Real soon. Hey, my intent here isn’t to be morbid, nor is it a case of this mumbo jumbo being “idle hands are the devils workshop”. The devil? And it’s not a matter of my getting pleasure out of pondering the minutiae, thus my mind wandering to the preposterous.
I know exactly what I’m doing.
My time is valuable- this moment I mean. There’s no need to disparage it. Or disparage anything else. I’m gonna enjoy Thursday without thinking ahead to tomorrow and Saturday and the next day and the next.
Today is about today.